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Wednesday, June 18, 2014

A Bouncing Bundle of Brooklyn

Well, I just knew that, after I moved to Brooklyn, the borough would become tres chic! And so it has. Brooklyn Decker has emerged as a successful model/"actress"! David Beckham named his son Brooklyn.

Why, if I had a kid, I'd name it Bayridge!

Today, one of New York City's free papers, AM New York, had a front-page article about the trend of naming kids (mostly girls) Brooklyn all around the country and, in fact, the world. It's the 28th most popular name for girls that is also a geographical name. How cool! Does anyone name their ankle-biters Queens? Manhattan? Bronx? Why, I have the urge to go out and adopt a rugrat right now and name it Staten Island Beaverhausen. (Though Coney Island Beaverhausen might be more appropriate, living with me. Hectic Cyclone of a single parent, freakshows and all!)

The only place that Brooklyn is not a popular name for a baby? New York fucking City, people! Can you believe it?

The Brooklyn borough president's excuse was that New Yorkers felt that would be "overkill." Thing that makes me go hmmm.

Yes, there are celebrities named after cities (Paris Hilton! Cheyenne Jackson! Julie London?) But not many named after boroughs. There are neighborhood names. Chelsea is popular. Not so much Chinatown, Soho or Midtown, though I find those delightful toddler names!

Well, koochy-koochy-koo, little Brooklyns! I wish you well with your atttention-grabbing name. Now, how are you going to live up to it? Pressure from the cradle.


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