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Thursday, September 13, 2012

Beaverhausen's Biased Billboard for Bitches

Florence Welch of + the Machine
Let's have it, bitches! "Let's Have a Kiki" overtakes the #1 spot on the current Billboard Dance/Club chart. Can we give our Scissor Sisters a hand? I know they'd love the sound of applause because, frankly, who doesn't? I thrive off it!

Last week, Usher was a "Scream" in the #1 spot but, this week, he's tumbled to #8. Kylie Minogue is falling off the chart with one of the summer's big, best dance club smashes, though she has been on Billboard Dance/Club for a very robust 13 weeks, peaking at #1. Down to #33 last week, she's now at #45. The diva from down undah has soared to the US dance chart's #1 position a total of 9 times to date. We loves our Kylie!

Florence +the Machine's sitting pretty in the #2 location, a serious contender for #1 next week with "Spectrum (Say My Name)." The song has already topped charts in the UK.

David, who runs the iconic Rebel Rebel record store in the Village, on Bleecker, tells me that the Madonna fans who come in to shop are always the nastiest queens who walk into his house of vinyl and cds (and that includes yours truly). But they qvelled at Queen Mother's performance in NYC last week, when all the nastiness gave way to ferocity and turned into sweet adoration. Madonna, on her way down from lofty first place, holding strongly at #6, where we found her last week as well, with "Turn on the Radio."

Red-hot Pink leaps from 18th place last time to #10 now, warbling "Blow Me (One Last Kiss)," which is what I always say, or something to that tune. Rebecca Ferguson's charting nicely with "Nothing's Real But Love," at #11; expect it to enter the Top Ten next week.

Mariah Carey's working it with "Triumphant," as indeed she is with one of her strongest club outings ever, at #11 up from #21, a Billboard Greatest Gainer (and we're not talking weight this time); expect it to go up, up and up!

Cyndi Lauper's "Sex Is in the Heel" and Adam Lambert's "Never Close Our Eyes" are at numbers 16 and 17, respectively. Lambert charted for 12 weeks on Dance/Club -- nice work there -- and peaked at 6th place, which is where Ms Lauper peaked as well, charting thus far at a solid 11 weeks.

Moving into the Top 50 are Kristine W's "Everything That I Got," produced by Bimbo Jones (bursting in at #36) and Pet Shop Boys' "Winner," remixes of the song they sang at the London Olympics (#38).

An anonymous Billboard-charting dance diva tells me, confidentially, that, to chart, one needs "to hire a Billboard promoter" and that "it's expensive and not cost-effective in today's market.... Absolutely necessary to get one to get on [Billboard Dance/Club]. Maybe Madonna doesn't need a promoter to get on ... but, as you can see, Pink, J Lo, Katy Perry, Debby Holiday, Kristine W all have a BB promoter." Kind of stacks the deck, no? So take this chart info with a grain of salt. For other charts of interest, one site you may want to visit comes recommended to me by Dj Ron Slomowicz:

And callin' out around the world, based on this week's stats: Thanks to Ukraine, Switzerland, Mexico, Indonesia, Colombia, Brazil, Slovenia, and to all my readers across Europe, in the UK, Canada and, of course, the USA. Despite recent events, world peace and love is a real possibility. Take it to the dance floor. Till next time, dance away the music! ~~ Dj Buddy Beaverhausen

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