New Yorkers willing to sell their souls to Satan for a nice apartment. No, it's not a new reality-tv series, it's the premise of the fictitious 666 Park Avenue, although real-life New York City apartment horror stories are largely more thrilling than anything that transpired on last night's premiere episode.
It's a mash-up of The Shining, Rosemary's Baby and Fantasy Island, with Vanessa Williams playing Tattoo to Terry Quinn's devilish Mr Roarke. Quinn plays his character, named Gavin Doran, like Donald Trump without the coif. In fact, he's shaved bald. If Quinn were to actually say "you're fired," it would take on a whole different meaning in the context of this show.
And, yes, as you might imagine, payback is a bitch as tenants can't keep up the spiritual rent and are mauled or sent to horrific ends that make simple homelessness look like dancing in the streets. For sadistic delight, you can't beat the repeated elevator doors smashing a tenant between them. As for the poor occupants who get sucked through walls and doors, we're less impressed. There were also too many bloody hands for a single episode. And, for heaven's sake, who would go down into that dimly lit laundry room in the first place? Isn't there a nice laundromat nearby where one can drop off/pick up?
Acting is as solid all around as the writing is lax and uninspired. But where is the plot behind all this? Nowhere to be found in the pilot as far as I can tell.
In reality, 666 Park Ave is a Lennox Hill address in Manhattan. The fictitious Drake is set at 999 Park, further uptown, its numerals inverted to be the ominous triple-six. But I can't imagine where this series can go. The premiere episode was repetitious enough as souls are usurped and bodies meet horrible ends. As Peggy Lee might pipe up, if she were watching this with us: "Is that all there is?"
Time will tell if this series can advance from its tedious high concept. But, as far as Dj Buddy B is concerned, 666 is 86'd from his prime-time viewing any time soon.
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