Happy Belated Birthday, Sylvester!

God, how did I miss out on this? It was in reading Joe.My.God.'s blog that I was alerted to this serious disco oversight. It was Sylvester's birthday three days ago! Happy Birthday in Heaven, Sylvester!

I saw Sylvester last, just two years before he died, performing in Key West. He was marvelous. I met him after the show. He was huge! He hugged me, and I think my head was right beneath his chest! (He was wearing heels, of course.)



Just weeks ago, I kissed his ex back-up girl, the divine Martha Wash, after seeing her perform at BB King's. Ah, Sylvester, if only you were alive today. You would have loved the show.

You are missed. Seriously missed on the dance music scene.

PS: I love Sandra's tribute song:

Sandra Bernhard Takes on Sarah Jessica Parker, "Sex in the City," Joan Rivers, Kathy Griffin

Sandra Berhard shoots from the hip. She isn't afraid to tell it like she sees it, that's for sure! But, sometimes, there may be a sense of bitterness in her attacks. Judge for yourself in her appearance today on Howard Stern.



Michael Musto commented: "On Howard Stern's show, mouthy comic Sandra Bernhard admitted that she turned down the role of Miranda on Sex and the City.

Batshit crazy?

No, hold on people, hear out her reasons.

For one thing, she says, the script was absolutely horrible.

Secondly, they were only paying $7,500 a week.

And what's more, 'To play third or fourth fiddle to Sarah Jessica Parker and put up with her shit?'

Nyah-uh.

But Cynthia Nixon decided it would be a good move, famously enough.

I guess she considered it a choice."

Only $30K/mo.? I should have auditioned!

Below, she disses other divas in her painfully honest, no-holds-barred manner.

Cold Mess

On an unusually leisurely mid-week morning, I went down to my friend & neighbor, Kevin's, apartment for a bite of breakfast, luvs, and two cups of java. We watched Wendy Williams' tv show. Wendy looks and sounds like RuPaul but that's not such a bad thing, necessarily. She was quite the trendy creature of fashion, I must say, in a striking black outfit courtesy of Lord & Taylor. I suppose her producers can splurge on Miss Williams' talk-show glad rags by inviting B-list people as her guests, desperate to advertise their latest commercial ventures for scraps. Today's top-billed guest: Sandra Bernhard.

Now, as a talent, I love Sandra to death. But when she showed up (late) for Wendy's interview, plugging both her gig on Hot in Cincinnati and her upcoming annual holiday show at Joe's Pub in New York December 28 through 31 (New Year's Eve Show), she looked more Halloween-appropriate. For one thing, her hair was a mess, as if she'd rolled out of bed, put on designer clothes and make-up, and stalked onto the set. For another thing -- more strikingly -- Kevin and I noticed she appeared to be missing teeth. She absolutely leered like a jack-o-lantern as she laughed and kibitzed with Wendy.

It wasn't just her trademark David Letterman-like gap. She appeared to be short of some lower teeth as well. Wendy paid no mind, however, but Kevin and I certainly did! Sandra proudly announced that her girlfriend did her hair for this appearance. But, embarrasingly, the producers signaled Wendy to ask Sandra to fix her hair while live, on the air, during her interview! Oh, my! I mean, how often are interviewees on talk shows asked to fix their appearances in the middle of a shoot? Like never?

Wendy complied with the direction. Sandra reached up and fluffed and patted the auburn rat's nest that was her coif for The Wendy Williams Show, which Wendy's producers were obviously in a tizzy over.

If I were Ms Bernhard, I'd (a) ask Santa for dental implants, and (b) stop using her gf as a hairdresser. Our Sandra might be hot in Cincinnati but, as Kevin remarked, she was a cold mess on morning tv in the rest of America.

(Off-topic p.s.: Does everyone already know that Halle Berry has 6 toes on one of her feet? E-eeww! Just heard about it. Please never wear open-toe shoes, Halle! Bleccchh!)